Anita teaches at a school. Her son is sitting his board exams this month. Every morning she walks to the small shrine near her house and says the same prayer: "Let my son do well." Yesterday a thought stopped her: "All I do here is ask. Is this the right way to pray? Am I asking in the wrong place?"
If that has ever crossed your mind, the Gita answers it directly. It does not scold the person who asks. The Lord says that when someone worships a form with faith, he makes that faith steady, and what the person receives comes by his arrangement. Then he adds one thing worth knowing.
The Lord does not break your faith
तस्य तस्याचलां श्रद्धां तामेव विदधाम्यहम् ॥ ७.२१ ॥
Whatever form a devotee wishes to worship with faith, I make that faith of his steady and unwavering.
The Lord says that whatever form a devotee wishes to worship with faith, he makes that faith steady in that very form (Gita 7.21).
So the deity you bow to does not make the Lord angry with you. He makes your faith stronger. Your family's worship, your chosen deity, your local shrine: all of it is accepted here.
Where what you receive comes from
लभते च ततः कामान्मयैव विहितान्हि तान् ॥ ७.२२ ॥
Endowed with that faith, he engages in the worship of that deity and obtains from it his desires, which are in truth granted by Me alone.
The Lord says that the worshipper serves that deity with that faith and obtains the desires he seeks, which are in truth arranged by him alone (Gita 7.22).
So asking is not wasted. What comes, comes. And behind it stands the Lord, which means that the thanks belong to him.
The one thing to know
The Lord also says that what is gained this way is perishable (Gita 7.23), because it was asked for with a limited view. An exam result comes, and then the next exam, and the next worry. Even the pleasures of heaven, he says, end when merit is spent (Gita 9.21).
Then he states a simple rule:
भूतानि यान्ति भूतेज्या यान्ति मद्याजिनोऽपि माम् ॥ ९.२५ ॥
Worshippers of the gods go to the gods, worshippers of the ancestors go to the ancestors, and worshippers of the spirits go to the spirits. But My worshippers come to Me.
You reach what you turn towards. Worshippers of the gods reach the gods, and the Lord's devotees reach him (Gita 9.25). This does not mean you should stop asking. It means that along with asking, you can also turn to the one who gives.
What this does not say
It does not say that asking is a sin. What is asked for comes by the Lord's arrangement (Gita 7.22), and those who come with a wish have already been called good (Gita 7.16).
It does not say that your deity is wrong. The Lord says that those who worship others with faith worship him too, only without the full understanding (Gita 9.23).
It does not say you should give up your prayers. It says to remember who stands behind the one you pray to.
An example
Think of a boy who asks his father for a bicycle every birthday. The bicycle comes, and he is delighted. Then one year, at ten, he says, "Papa, I don't need a bicycle. Just come out with me for a ride."
The father's joy that day is far greater than when he bought the bicycle. The bicycle was not a bad thing. But the boy had understood that the one who gave it matters more than the gift. The Gita says the same: look past the fruit to the one who gives it.
Anita did not give up her prayer. She simply added one line to it: "Thank you for what you have already given."
A practice for today
For one week, after your usual prayer, say one line with no request in it: "Thank you for what you have already given." After seven days, notice how it feels the next time you ask for something.
Questions readers ask
Is it wrong to pray for a job or money?
No. The Lord says that what is asked for comes, and that it is his arrangement (Gita 7.22). Just do not stop there; remember the giver too.
Does the Gita say my family deity is not enough?
No. The Lord makes faith steady (Gita 7.21), and says that worship offered with faith reaches him too (Gita 9.23). The Gita only adds that you may come to know who stands behind the deity.
What does "small understanding" mean? Is it an insult?
It is not. It means that only what is seen is asked for. The same people are called good (Gita 7.16).
How do I turn to the Lord himself?
Begin small. Give thanks before you ask, and sit quietly for a few minutes each day with nothing to ask. The Gita's rule is that you reach what you turn towards (Gita 9.25).
Going deeper
A detailed reading takes the verses in order, and a deeper reading takes up the hard questions and the commentators' streams. To see whom the Lord calls good, read Four Kinds of Devotees. The full sequence is in The Path of Devotion.